↧↧↧Not
too many years back, I was alone after 11 years of turbulent relationship.
In retrospect, I can see we were both a part of the problem. But the way it
ended, I will not take on my mantle. And I dearly wish that other women should
not have the same experience ... crumbling up in the bed and ugly crying for
approxemately a week isn´t my most proud moment.
The fact is just that here on the other side of the divorce, I have shared my
story with so many women – women who recognize the same feelings. And I´m not
only talking here in Greenland ...
He was cheating on me with a younger woman (read girl) ... how cliché, right?
it happens all around the globe ...
At the time, I thought it only happened to me and that I was worth nothing. That I had not done
well enough as a wife and that in fact if I just loved him a little more then he
would come back ... I had forgotten that I should have loved myself a little
more.
Many Hollywood films have told above story, nothing new there. They lack just to
show how ugly you can cry, how ugly you look when you are standing and shouting
humiliated and broken down, how
powerlessness one can feel struggling to maintain
just a little dignity . Then there's the paternity cases if you have children,
lawyers, and maybe even a shit storm on Facebook ...(pardon my french) some of
the things we (abandoned poor women) know - but might not admit. After 3-4
weeks without sleep and countless questions about why? I got angry. Really
angry. He wasn´t going to break me down ... (in fact, it was myself and the
level I had set for the perfect relationship, the perfect body, the perfect
status update on Facebook, etc.). So I started to run. I ran and ran, I became
freaking Forrest Gump! I lost 10 kilos, began to seek answers within myself.
Went to psychologist
(Schyyy ..offcourse we don´t talk about the “she has become insane” part) and
slowly, I got better.
Facebook thrives on jilted women who posts a new great profile picture, of
themselves while they are having it "Sooo good" after a break up. And believe me, the confirmation that it is to check
how many likes a new profile picture gives, no matter how little anyone will
admit it, is great! so keep on posting, women ;)
Also I read. All kinds of self-realization books. But the absolute best book was
this one that I would like to recommend all women to read:
"Women who love too much" by Robin Norwood, it gets 5 stars from me! The
way it pulls you away from the other party in the relationship and get your
focus turned to yourself, made me read it again and again, each time with a new
aha! moment.
and with this, I just want to say: You are not alone!
Use your anger to something physically good for your body. Retrieve your
skills, interests, hobbies, work with yourself, focus on yourself and become an
even better version of you. Not that you need it as revenge, but because you
can!
too many years back, I was alone after 11 years of turbulent relationship.
In retrospect, I can see we were both a part of the problem. But the way it
ended, I will not take on my mantle. And I dearly wish that other women should
not have the same experience ... crumbling up in the bed and ugly crying for
approxemately a week isn´t my most proud moment.
The fact is just that here on the other side of the divorce, I have shared my
story with so many women – women who recognize the same feelings. And I´m not
only talking here in Greenland ...
He was cheating on me with a younger woman (read girl) ... how cliché, right?
it happens all around the globe ...
At the time, I thought it only happened to me and that I was worth nothing. That I had not done
well enough as a wife and that in fact if I just loved him a little more then he
would come back ... I had forgotten that I should have loved myself a little
more.
Many Hollywood films have told above story, nothing new there. They lack just to
show how ugly you can cry, how ugly you look when you are standing and shouting
humiliated and broken down, how
powerlessness one can feel struggling to maintain
just a little dignity . Then there's the paternity cases if you have children,
lawyers, and maybe even a shit storm on Facebook ...(pardon my french) some of
the things we (abandoned poor women) know - but might not admit. After 3-4
weeks without sleep and countless questions about why? I got angry. Really
angry. He wasn´t going to break me down ... (in fact, it was myself and the
level I had set for the perfect relationship, the perfect body, the perfect
status update on Facebook, etc.). So I started to run. I ran and ran, I became
freaking Forrest Gump! I lost 10 kilos, began to seek answers within myself.
Went to psychologist
(Schyyy ..offcourse we don´t talk about the “she has become insane” part) and
slowly, I got better.
Facebook thrives on jilted women who posts a new great profile picture, of
themselves while they are having it "Sooo good" after a break up. And believe me, the confirmation that it is to check
how many likes a new profile picture gives, no matter how little anyone will
admit it, is great! so keep on posting, women ;)
Also I read. All kinds of self-realization books. But the absolute best book was
this one that I would like to recommend all women to read:
"Women who love too much" by Robin Norwood, it gets 5 stars from me! The
way it pulls you away from the other party in the relationship and get your
focus turned to yourself, made me read it again and again, each time with a new
aha! moment.
and with this, I just want to say: You are not alone!
Use your anger to something physically good for your body. Retrieve your
skills, interests, hobbies, work with yourself, focus on yourself and become an
even better version of you. Not that you need it as revenge, but because you
can!
And how is this related to fashion? I became the best fashion designer I could be. Thanks to the divorce, I was forced to take a long look at my life and my future goals.
And if you need inspiration for were it took me like my page on Facebook:
www.facebook.com/arctinista
and subscribe my blog, so you always receive an email when I tell about my
thoughts, ideas or other things from my everyday life.
If you want to see my designs -you can go to:
www.nuukcouture.gl
you got a friend
love,
Arctinista
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